For years, I was told I was 'too direct'.
One day, I was told I was "Far too direct", so I decided to try to get to the bottom of it and I asked, "What would be direct enough?"
Crickets.
To this day, I still don't have an answer to that question.
Thankfully I learned to read the signs and have become adept at adjusting my behaviour.
Feedback has to be useful.
It needs to be clear, DIRECT, actionable, and honest, and it must be based on observation, not opinion.
In all honesty, I probably was a little to the right of the bell-curve when it came to being direct.
What I didn't know was what 'direct enough' looked and sounded like, which meant it was extremely difficult to adjust my behaviour.
Make behavioural adjustments easy for people to make.
Be specific about what you see and hear, and give clear examples of what 'good' looks and sounds like.
Behavioural adjustments are a case of 'turning up or down', not 'turning off' certain behaviours.
We're not trying to change people: We're trying to help them use what they have to their advantage.
It's case of fine-tuning and refining, not transplanting their personality.
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